Category Archives: Historical Fiction

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Word To Your Mother: Top Ten Tuesday Collaborates and Listens

Salutations, Bookworms!

I know you stayed up all night trying to guess the topic for this week’s Top Ten Tuesday with The Broke and The Bookish, didn’t you?! This week we’ve been asked to list off the top ten words or phrases that make us want to pick up a book. I’m a refined consumer of literature, see? JUST because a book says something saucy on the book jacket doesn’t mean I’ll buy it, but there are some terms that don’t hurt a book’s chances. I may be a snob, but I’m highly susceptible to marketing tactics.

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1. Time Travel- Awww yeah, I love me some time travel. I typically prefer accidental time travel, so if there’s a deliberate machine involved? Probably not going to be my cup of tea. However. Outlander, The River of No Return, and The Time Traveler’s Wife? Yes, yes, and yes. Break me off a piece of that time space continuum.

2. Penguins- Hi, I’m Katie. Have we met? If we have met in the past, oh, 22 years or so, you know that PENGUINS are my spirit animal. Sadly, they don’t make a ton of appearances in books for grown ups, but hey, kids books are a thing. Remember If You Were a Penguin? Mr. Popper’s Penguins? Or how about when penguins DO show up in adult books, like the awesomeness that was the trip to Antarctica in Where’d You Go Bernadette? Penguins can ONLY help you, I say! Penguins forever! (Seriously. Just ask Alfred. Or Josie.)

PENGUIN LOVE

PENGUIN LOVE

3. Plague- This probably makes me horrible, but plagues are fascinating! Reading up on the bubonic plague in Ken Follett’s World Without End was the shiz-nit. And the letumosis outbreak in Cinder? That’s where it’s at! And my heavens, THE STAND! The mother-loving Stand, people!!!

4. Flowers- I LOVE flowers. Darn near as much as I love penguins. It can be pretty intense. So, when flowers feature heavily in a story I do some serious geeking out. Vanessa Diffenbaugh’s Language of Flowers was amazing. More of this, please, author types. (Gardens are good, too, but I don’t grow vegetables. Has anyone else noticed that Alice Hoffman is maybe a little obsessed with growing tomatoes? No? Just me? Moving on then…)

5. Zombie- “What’s in your heeeeeeeeeeeeeeead, in your heeeeeeead, zombie, zombie, zo-omb-a-yuh-a-yuh-a-yuh!” Don’t pretend that you don’t rock out to The Cranberries. And if you legitimately don’t rock out to The Cranberries, don’t tell me, because, yodel-y Irish rock from the 90s kicks arse. But really. I like for real Zombies, too. World War Z and Warm Bodies are my JAM. 

6. History- I am a sucker for historical fiction. Chilling in ancient Greece like in The Song of Achilles or dabbling in the Underground Railroad and rocking a bonnet like in The Last Runaway or experiencing the scandalous world of the Tudor court in, well, basically anything by Philippa Gregory… It’s the only way I can time travel, and really the only way I WANT to time travel. Indoor plumbing is my favorite.

7. Dystopia- It’s almost ridiculous the amount I adore screwy fractured future scenarios. The Giver and The Hunger Games and Brave New World and 1984 and The Handmaid’s Tale just make me feel warm and fuzzy about our effed up present. Let’s face it y’all. It could be a whole lot worse. Gratitude, brought to you by oppressive governments, lack of color, religious persecution, and kids fighting to the death for sport! 

8. Saga- Sweeping epics are right up my alley. The word “saga” implies length and drama and change and grand scale. Les Miserables and Gone With The Wind and The Pillars of The Earth are some of my favorites. If it couldn’t be made into a mini-series or a very long movie, I want nothing to do with it. (That isn’t really true. See this? Terrible liar. I tell you IMMEDIATELY when I lie. I also like books that couldn’t be long movies and mini series, but it didn’t WORK with my POINT there. Ugh. I’m a walking vial of sodium pentothal.)

9. Whimsy- I’ve mentioned how fervently I adore Amy Sherman-Palladino, head writer of Gilmore Girls and Bunheads haven’t I? Yes. I know. I obviously have. One of my all time favorite quotes came out of Kirk, Stars Hollow’s resident weirdo when he was describing his new Condoleeza Rice decorative mailbox: “Whimsy goes with everything.” Whimsy DOES go with everything, books in particular. Alice in Wonderland probably gets to wear the tiara for most whimsical title of all time, but Harry Potter, Mr. Penumbra’s 24 Hour Bookstore, and The Night Circus aren’t in short supply on the whimsy front.

Curiouser and curiouser...

Curiouser and curiouser…

10. Awkward- I spent the weekend with some of the world’s most excellent friends, and we were discussing high school. They both said that they had enjoyed themselves. I said, “I was too busy being morose and wearing really baggy pants.” Both of those things are true, and both are reasons I have a serious soft spot for the awkward characters. Bridget Jones? Charlie from The Perks of Being a Wallflower? Eleanor & Park? To paraphrase a song I heard far too often at wedding receptions, “These are my people. This is where I come from.” Teen angst is CHARACTER BUILDING, dangit!

Oh Bookworms, my Bookworms, what are some of the words and phrases that make YOU think you’ll like a book?

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Well, That’s Not What I Was Expecting (A Top Ten Tuesday Adventure.)

Tis Tuesday, my dear Bookworms!

Today’s Top Ten Tuesday topic is brought to you, as usual by The Broke and The Bookish. They’ve asked the book bloggers of the internet to list out the books we’ve read that really weren’t what we were expecting. Something you thought you’d love but didn’t? Something you thought would be terrible that you adored? Let’s get to listing!

Katie Is Disappointed

This is my McKayla Maroney face. Sort of.

This is my McKayla Maroney face. Sort of.

1. A Visit From The Goon Squad by Jennifer Egan. I feel like an uncultured blob of loser admitting this, but I really did not like this book. I can always tell how much I like a book by how well I remember it. The only thing I really remember from this one? One of the teenager’s mothers made homemade yogurt. That was weird. Otherwise? Something about gold leaf instead of Viagara? Yeah. I expected rock-n-roll coming of age stories. I got angry middle aged people lamenting their lost youths. Just… No.

2. On Gold Mountain by Lisa See. I’m bad at non-fiction, and I didn’t realize just how much of a plod this was going to be when I picked it up. I had visions of Snow Flower and the Secret Fan and Shanghai Girls and Peony in Love and I got… Well. None of those things.There were an awful lot of less than thrilling business ventures were described in great detail. Bummer.

3. An Abundance of Katherines by John Green. After reading The Fault In Our Stars, I was quite certain I would love everything John Green had ever written. Too bad I spent the majority of this book wanting to smack Colin around…

4. The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho. I know there are zillions of people who found deep meaning in this book. I happen to not be one of them. I would have stayed at home with my flock of sheep, and would never advise anyone to go in search of their personal legend if it meant giving up all their security. That’s just plain foolish, y’all.

5. Slaughterhouse Five by Kurt Vonnegut. I was sure that this book was destined to by my new favorite novel- all the cool kids dig Vonnegut! Sadly, it just was not my thing. Sorry Vonnegut fans, I am not one of you.

Katie Is Pleased

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This is my “YAY!” face.

1. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. I KNOW. The amount I rave about these books is ridiculous, but honestly? I almost didn’t read them. My Aunt Margie got my mom hooked on them. I remember calling my mom from college and she’d be all, “Oooh these BOOKS! She’s being tried for witchcraft! But she went back in time. Jamie will save her. He must!” And I was like, “That sounds ridiculous!” Eventually I gave into peer pressure, and the rest is delightful history. But. Now you know the truth.

2. The Fault In Our Stars by John Green. I first heard about this book on the YA blog circuit. I’d never heard of John Green before (for shame, I know) but I was completely expecting this book to be a Lurlene McDaniel knockoff (Lurlene McDaniel wrote a series of books on critically ill teenagers that were all the melodramatic rage when I was in 5th grade.) I thought I’d get snarky blog fodder from it. Have I mentioned that I’m not a good person? Anyway, I loved this book so much I read it in a single sitting.

3. Gone With The Wind by Margaret Mitchell. I read this initially because I felt like it was something I should read. I was thinking that it would be a slow-going classic that would put me to sleep. I WAS WRONG! So very wrong. And so very HAPPY to have been so wrong!

4. Still Alice by Lisa Genova. I can’t even tell you how long this sat on my shelf. My mom gave it to me, but I saw the word “alzheimer’s” and thought “old people book.” Isn’t that terrible? I’m ashamed of myself. My mom usually has decent taste in books, I should trust her opinions, ESPECIALLY after the Outlander incident. Sigh. Teenage habits die hard I guess.

5. Pride & Prejudice by Jane Austen. I read this as a senior in high school. It was assigned reading, so I naturally expected the worst. I was utterly tickled to find myself engrossed in the soapy scandals of the sisters Bennett! It was exciting and intriguing and full of questioning what glances and offhand comments meant. It was like Jane Austen KNEW how I analyzed boys! (Which is rather unfortunate, seeing as I was analyzing boys quite a long time after Ms. Austen was… This probably explains my lack of dates.)

What books surprised YOU, Bookworms? The good, the bad, the ugly. Spill it!

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Sisters Are Doing It For Themselves (Top Ten Tuesday Rewind: Kickass Heroines)

What’s Up, Bookworms?

The ladies at The Broke and The Bookish do an amazing job of coming up with Top Ten Tuesday prompts, you know? They’ve kept this going for a couple of years now, which is kind of incredible. This week’s topic is a “rewind,” so it gives me the opportunity to do one of the top ten lists that were used before I started blogging. I have chosen to make a list of Kickass Heroines! There are so many awesome female characters in literature; this should be a super fun showcase!

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1. Katniss Everdeen from The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins. I really don’t care if The Hunger Games are teetering on the brink of overexposure. Katniss is BADASS. She learns to hunt with a bow and arrow to provide for her family. She steps up to take her little sister’s place in a barbaric contest put on my her oppressive government. She manages to NOT DIE during the tournament. And then? She outsmarts the game makers. I want Katniss on my side in the Zombie Apocalypse. I”m just putting that out there.

2. Caris from World Without End by Ken Follett. World Without End is the sequel to Pillars of the Earth but since it’s set 300 years into the future, it’s only sort of sequel-ish. Anyway. Caris is awesome because she keeps up a rockin’ hospital during the bubonic plague. Nobody at the time understands germ theory,  but she makes some brilliant decisions (face masks, regular hand washing) that keep the medical staff alive. This seriously pisses off the priests who claim only God can prevent illness- the nuns in the hospital that take this approach to healing drop like flies. She may never have gotten the upper hand in the church, but at least she outlived the jerkface Prior. Take that!

3. Hermione Granger from Harry Potter by JK Rowling. Hermoine RULES. She is smart and brave and fabulous. She could easily have carried her own series. ADORE. Book Hermione isn’t as drop-dead-gorgeous as Emma Watson, but I think if Hermione were real, she’d totally approve of the casting decision. It may only be a Muggle university, and she may have dropped out, but Emma Watson DID get into Dartmouth.

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4. Claire from Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. I know I talk about loving Jamie all the time, but Claire is pretty stupendous. I love what she does with all her modern medical knowledge when she goes back in time. Making ether? Making peni-freaking-cillin? Removing tonsils at the dinner table with only whiskey as anesthetic?! Plus, she is really resourceful and accepts some old school remedies that actually WORK. Leeches? Gross, but effective at swelling bruise reduction. She’s pretty fabulous. No wonder Jamie adores her.

5. Arya Stark from Game of Thrones by George R.R. Martin. Arya starts out as a spoiled tomboy, but once her father is executed, she’s forced to grow up fast. It’s a good thing she’s not gone through puberty yet, and that she took those fencing lessons. Disguised as a boy? Apprenticing to creepy temple? Keeping herself alive when all the Lannisters in the land would have her head on a pike? I wouldn’t cross her, she’s scrappy.

6. Joan from Pope Joan by Diana Woolfolk Cross. Joan loves to read, and she’s smart. Sadly, her dad is a jerkwad who doesn’t believe women should be educated. Thanks to a stubborn tutor, she’s taught the basics and accepted with her less scholarly brother into a real school. She goes to great lengths to ensure her right to learn. After a marauding band of vikings lay waste to her town, she escapes by dressing in her brother’s robes and joins a monastery. Oh, yeah. And she sort of accidentally becomes the Pope. Woops.

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7. Jane Eyre from Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte. Jane refuses to believe she’s a horrible human being despite the horrendous treatment she endures in her childhood. She goes on to excel in her studies and become a governess. She’s making her own way in the world when fate steps in, and she falls hard for Mr. Rochester. However, when the whole crazy wife in the attic comes to light, Jane has enough self respect to skip town. Then, when the crazy wife jumps off the roof and Rochester is a broken man, she finds it in her heart to forgive him. Compassion, resilience, strength? Yep, Jane is totally role model material.

8. Lisbeth Salander from The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo Series by Stieg Larsson. Alright. Confession time. I didn’t LOVE these books. They were alright. A lot of talk about Swedish politics I wasn’t crazy about, sexual violence repels me, and Blomquist was a man-whore (he seriously would bang any breathing female, I swear.) HOWEVER! Lisbeth was AWESOME. Super smart, photographic memory, badass hacker with a penchant for leather and exposing corrupt government officials? Oh yeah. She’s nobody’s victim!

9. Colonel Christina Eliopolis from World War Z by Max Brooks. This book is written in vignettes with a wide swath of humanity describing their experiences during the Zombie Apocalypse. This woman was AMAZING. She’s stranded alone in Zombie ridden territory and manages, with the help of another woman on a CB radio (real or imagined, it’s up for debate), to kick a whole lot of zombie butt all by herself. I want her on my team, yo. Can you imagine a Z team with Eliopolis and Katniss? It would be like a Rick and Daryl duo, but they’re sisters killing zombies for themselves. (While we’re on the subject, I want Michonne on my team too. If you don’t know who Rick, Daryl, and Michonne are, you need to stop what you’re doing and check out the first three seasons of The Walking Dead in their entirety.)

10. Jo March from Little Women by Louisa May Alcott. Who doesn’t love Jo?! I could gush about how much I love her, but I’ll let her explain why… “I want to do something splendid…something heroic or wonderful that won’t be forgotten after I’m dead. I don’t know what, but I’m on the watch for it and mean to astonish you all someday.”

Who are some of your favorite literary ladies, Bookworms? Tell me all about it. Girl Power!

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Get Swept Up In The River of No Return by Bee Ridgway

Salutations, Bookworms!

I’ve been a book blogger for a while now, 8 months or so. I’m still not entirely sure what I’m doing, but I’m pretty sure I’m doing something RIGHT, because I recently got an email from a publisher offering me a free book! Now, this is not the first time I’ve been offered a book, but it IS the first time I’ve accepted one, since time constraints and/or lack of interest have prevented me from taking them in the past. You’re supposed to be VERY CLEAR AND UP FRONT when you review a book you’ve gotten for free. HEY INTERNET! I GOT THIS BOOK FOR FREE!

Now that we have the formalities out of the way… I got an email offering me a copy of The River of No Return by Bee Ridgway. I was intrigued because the email claimed that fans of Diana Gabaldon’s Outlander would like this book. I was intrigued, but also a little wary. I mean, was I in for a poorly executed copy of Gabaldon’s awesomeness? I’m not very nice when that happens…

rivernoreturn

I needn’t have worried. This book had elements I’ve seen in other places, but they were woven together into something completely original and enthralling. If you took the time travel romance element of Outlander and combined it with the conspiracy theory aspect of, say, Mr. Penumbra’s 24 Hour Bookstore, added a some of the magical bits from The Night Circus, and put it in a blender with a chocolate milkshake, you’d get close to The River of No Return. It’s delicious.

Without getting super spoiler-happy, I’ll give you the lowdown. Nick Falcott is a Georgian-era English aristocrat who decides to fight in the Napoleonic wars. Just as he’s about to be done in by a Frenchman, he vanishes into thin air and re-materializes in 2003. Oops. He’s rescued by a mysterious group known as “The Guild” who locate accidental time travelers and help them re-acclimate to the time they’ve jumped into. The Guild provides the unwitting time travelers with money and sets up new lives for them in new countries. They also force them to learn medieval Finnish. (A secret society has got to have SOME quirks, right? They can’t ALL speak Latin, for heaven’s sake.) Anywho, Nick gets all situated with his indoor plumbing and his blue jeans and indulges his affinity for homemade stinky cheeses and beautiful women for a good 10 years. All is well until he receives a summons from The Guild…

Meanwhile, in 1815, Julia Percy is super sad because her grandpa kicks the bucket and she’s stuck with her douchey cousin as heir to the manor (or castle. They call it a castle, but as there are no crowns involved, I don’t think it counts.) Julia doesn’t realize her grandfather’s gift of freezing time is anything more than a strange game the two played. Of course she realizes it’s not NORMAL to go around stopping time, but she has no idea just how important she will be to The Guild, their enemies, and Nick (bow chicka bow wow).

I imagined nick looked rather like Hugh Dancy in period costumes. You know, plus the appropriate scars and whatnot.

I imagined nick looked rather like Hugh Dancy in period costumes. You know, plus the appropriate scars and whatnot.

Okay. I need to stop talking before the spoilers happen. Here’s some stuff I loved. First, there were some seriously funny one-liners in this book. I laughed out loud several times (particularly when Nick pondered his existence as “just a dude.”) Second, despite having a very science-y twist with the time travel, it was very accessible to me. The idea that time travel was facilitated by feelings and the flow of human history rather than, like, equations and black holes made me really happy. Third, time travel brings all sorts of fun colorful characters together who wouldn’t normally get to hang out. Gender bending teen from the 80s is like BFF with a medieval Swedish turnip farmer? It’s awesome.

My only complaint, if I can even call it that, is that the book left a lot of unfinished business. I assume (and hope… nay DEMAND!) that this is the first in a series of novels, because if it isn’t, I might cry. The concepts aren’t new, but the take is fresh and FUN. If you liked Outlander or Mr. Penumbra’s 24 Hour Bookstore or The Night Circus or just generally enjoy books that don’t suck? Check out The River of No Return. Bee Ridgway, you’ve got yourself an admirer right here.

Alright, Bookworms. Since we’re talking time travel here, if you could go back to any point in history, where would you go? Why? Would you try to smuggle in deodorant, toilet paper, and contact lenses? (Because I totally would…)

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I’ve Got a Crush on You! And you, and you, and you, too!

Hey There Bookworms,

Before I get into today’s Top Ten Tuesday list, I want to take a moment to give a shout-out to the Hubs. That’s right, today Jim turns 31. Happy Birthday! The thing that makes this birthday extra super special is that it is ALSO the anniversary of our first date. The TENTH anniversary. (For a first date that took place on a 21st birthday, it was shockingly wholesome.) Yay, Jim! Happy Birth-iversary! I totally still have a crush on you.

First photo of us as a couple, a mere 10 days after that first date. Which reminds me... Happy Almost Anniversary to Meresa and Scott! (Yeah. He went to a wedding with me after a week and a half. Keeper.)

First photo of us as a couple, a mere 10 days after that first date. Which reminds me… Happy Almost Anniversary to Meresa and Scott! (Yeah. He went to a wedding with me after a week and a half of dating. Keeper.)

You know what the best part about a stable relationship is? Jim’s not even a tiny bit threatened by the fact that I’ve got crushes on other boys. Sure, it helps that all the boys are fictional characters… Like any bookworm, I have an active imagination. Since The Broke and The Bookish asked so nicely, today I shall list my Top Ten Fictional Character Crushes.

TTT3W

1. Fred and/or George Weasley. So, here’s the thing. I hate to admit to this, but, I didn’t read Harry Potter until after the first movie came out. This means, among other things, that my mental images of characters were tainted going into the series. I LOVE the Weasley twins, and the movie twins are pretty cute. I know they’re shorter and rounder in the books, but they’re so funny and awesome. Laughter is a big deal to me, and I’m pretty sure a Weasley twin would keep me in stitches. (Maybe not as well as Jim, though. His sense of humor is incredibly absurd and he frequently makes me laugh until my tummy hurts.)

2. Jamie Fraser. I know, I know. I rave about Outlander constantly, but SWOON, Jamie! He’s strong and smart and he speaks lots of languages and he looks hot in a kilt. Plus, he’s so head over heels for Claire, it’s redonk. I mean, really.

3. Jon Snow. The new season of Game of Thrones started up the other night. I watched season 1, but for whatever reason I fell off the wagon after that. I’m considering jumping back on. I mean, I’ve read all the books, you know? And. JON SNOW. Ned Stark’s bastard child is one hot piece of ice, if you know what I’m saying. Really though. I love book Jon. I love TV Jon. Long live Jon Snow!

Celibacy on The Wall? What a waste! Source.

Celibacy on The Wall? What a waste! Source.

4. Mr. Darcy. Oh yeah, I just pulled out the old Pride and Prejudice card. How could I not? I mean, he’s MR. DARCY. Proud. Prejudiced. Secretly in love with the feisty Elizabeth Bennett. Be still my heart!

5. Gus. You remember, the dreamboat cancer patient from The Fault In Our Stars? Sure, he didn’t speak the way any REAL teenager would. He was far too smart and witty and self assured. But. That’s what Tiger Beat dreams are made of.

6. Charlie. Yep. My teenage self had a big old crush on Charlie from The Perks of Being a Wallflower. I loved his brilliant socially stunted antics. And his wounded puppy psyche. Sigh.

7. Marius Pontmercy. I think every girl on the planet imagines that she’s Eponine when they listen to “On My Own.” Who among us has never tasted the bitter pill of unrequited love?! Les Miserables the book gives Marius a much juicier backstory than the musical. It certainly doesn’t hurt Marius’s swoonworthiness that Eddie Redmayne played the part in the movie…

Oh, Eddie. You only love me when I'm gutshot and bleeding out in the gutters of Paris... Source

Oh, Eddie. You only love me when I’m gutshot and bleeding out in the gutters of Paris… Source

8. Stu Redman. Why yes, I DO have a thing for the no-nonsense leader of the “good-guy” pack from The Stand. He is immune to the super flu, plus he’s got a cowboy vibe. I don’t know, maybe I was swayed by the fact that Lieutenant Dan played him in the mini series. The heart wants what the heart wants!

9. Roger MacKenzie. Yeah. He’s from Outlander too. Roger is one dishy time traveler. Green eyed, Scottish accented, folk song crooning, tall drink of water. Mmmmhmmm.

10. Jim. Yes, I am cheating and making my husband into a fictional character. Public display of affection, blog style. Oh. Fictional Jim may or may not also be Batman. Or just own tasteful Batman statues. XOXO.

Bookworms, tell me. Who are your bookish fictional character crushes? We’re equal opportunity here. Dudes, ladies, whatever floats your boat. Share the lurve!

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Sorry, No Blog Today. April Fools! (The Shoemaker’s Wife by Adriana Trigiani)

Howdy Bookworms,

I hope those of you who celebrate Easter have recovered from your chocolate bunny and jelly bean comas on this fine morning. It’s April Fool’s Day, but I’m not a fan of the holiday. I am a terrible liar, and I’m also embarrassingly gullible. Not a good combination. Plus, pranks have a way of turning mean, and I’m not a fan of meanness either. So. Let’s talk about… A book! (I know, you’re shocked!)

This month for Wine and Whining Book Club (I consistently get crap from the book club’s membership for what I’ve named it, but I like homonyms and alliterations, so I shan’t be changing it) we selected The Shoemaker’s Wife by Adriana Trigiani. The Shoemaker’s Wife is the tale of an unlikely couple re-united from their small Italian mountain town in New York City.

I'm really not sure who the broad on the cover is...

I’m really not sure who the broad on the cover is…

Circumstances conspire to send the (for all intents and purposes) orphaned Ciro away from his home in a convent the Italian Alps to become an apprentice shoemaker in America. Unfortunately, his exit from town is untimely as he is separated from his new found lady love, Enza. Shortly after Ciro’s departure, Enza and her family fall on hard times and she and her father make the decision to emigrate to America as well. Their emigration takes place during the early 1910s, so their journey reads like the quintessential Ellis Island tale.

Ciro and Enza’s path to finding each other again is not an easy one. They both have their share of adventures. Enza is a talented seamstress but stuck in Hoboken in a Cinderella-esque situation. Ciro is distracted by a high maintenance local beauty and turns out to be a kick ass boot maker. Their trials and tribulations give you a great picture of the times in which they live, and they talk enough about pasta to make you hungry.

Spoilers are the bane of my existence, because it’s so difficult to talk about books without giving EVERYTHING away. I will say this much… While I enjoyed this book overall, there was a critical scene that reminded me a LOT of a scene in another one of Trigiani’s books, Lucia, Lucia. Consider this your SPOILER ALERT. Now. The goings on of How I Met Your Mother aside, people being ditched at the altar is NOT a common thing. Things rarely get to the point of tuxedos and gowns being donned when weddings fall apart. The fact that this occurred in both of the Trigiani books disappoints me, I mean, calling off a wedding a couple months ahead of time is infinitely more realistic. It’s certainly more dramatic to pull the jilted at the altar routine, but it’s almost too easy… That’s probably an unfair assessment, but I’m a giant snob-a-saurus rex.

Safe to read again. If this is your first Trigiani novel, and you like historical fiction, you’ll love it! So, Bookworms, are you ever frustrated by authors recycling story lines? Getting repetitive? Anybody else run into that?

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Top Ten Tuesday: Most Recommended Books

Greetings, Bookworms!

It’s Tuesday, and you know what THAT means. No, no, it is not time for tacos. (But dangit, now I want tacos!) It’s time for Top Ten Tuesday with The Broke and The Bookish! Today they’ve asked me to list out the ten books I recommend most often. So. Without further ado…

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1. Outlander by Diana Gabaldon. I have foisted this series upon countless friends. I love to recommend it because it’s got a little bit of something for everyone. It’s one of those rare finds where I’m confident most of my pals will enjoy it. There are few things as awkward as giving someone a book and hearing they hated it, you know? Outlander has a little sci fi, some historical fiction, a touch of steamy romance novel, and, well, Jamie Fraser. (Siiiigh)

2. Harry Potter by JK Rowling. This is kind of a throwaway answer because it’s not like it’s possible for someone to have never heard of Harry Potter. However. Anyone who seems skeptical about the series? I implore them to read it. Like… I’m sincerely concerned about people who don’t enjoy HP. How can you not like MAGIC and WHIMSY and AWESOMENESS?!

My patronus is a penguin. Demetors don't stand a CHANCE against the impossible cutness... And pecking.

My patronus is a penguin. Demetors don’t stand a CHANCE against the impossible cutness… And pecking.

3. The Handmaid’s Tale by Margaret Atwood. This book is amazing and I think everyone should read it. Everyone. I’ve loaned out my copy on multiple occasions. It’s a cautionary tale for the ages, my friends.

4. Pope Joan by Diana Woolfolk Cross. Some of the best historical fiction I’ve ever read. It’s about an accidental lady Pope. Timely, what with a new Pope being elected and all.

5. Les Miserables by Victor Hugo. Occasionally, people will ask me for recommendations on classics I really enjoyed. I won’t lie, it’s a long ass book, but it’s totally worth the read. If you’re familiar with the musical already, it gives you a great back story on Fantine, which is fabulous. Oh and did you know that Gavroche and Eponine are siblings? I know. I. KNOW! Crazy right? You need to read this.

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Cosette is still little more than a plot catalyst, though.

6. The Book Thief by Markus Zusak. I try to get people to read this all the time. It’s another one of those that I’ve found is almost universally appealing. This one, of course, requires you to have an entire box of tissues on hand as you engage in the catharsis of bawling your eyes out. Worth it.

7. Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller. This book tells the most incredible love story. Miller did such a great job of drawing her characters’ personalities that you get completely engrossed in their love story. You follow Achilles and Patroclus from childhood and watch their relationship grow and mature. Just beautiful. And yeah. It’s about two dudes. Which is a nice change of pace from what I normally read, you know? (You probably need tissues for this one too.)

8. Pillars of the Earth by Ken Follett. It’s just really well drawn historical fiction. I love it to pieces. It’s another chunkster, but it moves fast. Don’t be intimidated by its length, you’ll enjoy yourself! (And then you’ll be really grateful that you have indoor plumbing and floors that aren’t dirt and stuff, because the Middle Ages were DIRTY, y’all.)

Starz did a mini series based on the book. Eddie Redmayne played Jack. You're welcome. (Image from Oprah.com)

Starz did a mini series based on the book. Eddie Redmayne played Jack. You’re welcome. (Image from Oprah.com)

9. Gone With The Wind by Margaret Mitchell. No, having seen the movie is NOT the same thing. Not at all. It leaves out Scarlett’s first two children, for heaven’s sake! (That’s really not a spoiler, they aren’t major plot points, and the fact that they aren’t makes Scarlett all the more Scarlett-y.)

10. World War Z by Max Brooks. I don’t read a whole lot of zombie literature, but I thought this book rocked in a big way. I’m a huge fan of The Walking Dead (TV series, I haven’t read the comics) so the zombie lore intrigues me. I thought this book gave an awesome and realistic account of how a zombie apocalypse might go down. You’ll probably have nightmares. Fair warning.

There we are- ten books I recommend to people on the regular. What are some of your favorite titles to pass around?

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Top Ten Tuesday: The Shelf of Shame

Greetings, Bookworms!

You know when you’re in a bookstore, browsing, and you get sucked in by picking up a title in the bargain bin? How about when you have grand intentions of bettering yourself and pick up a pile o’ classics only to watch them collect dust on your shelves? We’ve all got the shelf of shame. And the ladies at the Broke and the Bookish? They want us to own up to it. Today’s Top Ten Tuesday: Stuff I Bought But Never Read.

toptentuesday1. Madame Bovary by Gustave Flaubert. Sometimes (okay, a lot of times) I get self important and think that I will be able to appreciate even the most highbrow of classics. That’s when I buy things like Madame Bovary and then watch them moulder on my shelves for an eternity. I mean, I SHOULD like this. A doctor’s wife has adulterous affairs? I mean, hello Anna Karenina. How’s it going, Lady Chatterley? Why did I never get down with Madame Bovary? No idea.

2. Heart of Darkness by Joseph Conrad. This is always on smart people’s lists of favorite books. I’m highly susceptible to peer pressure whilst making decisions inside the Barnes and Noble… Amazon doesn’t judge me the way a hipster cashier would!

3. The Mayor of Casterbridge by Thomas Hardy. I bought this because Tess of the d’Urbervilles was so fantastic. However… The lack of female main character and/or the really unappealing portrait of what I assume to be the “mayor” on the cover has kept me from actually bending the spine of this one.

4. The Count of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas. I really do want to read this… It’s just so THICK. I’m not easily intimidated by big books, but this sucker is the size of Les Miserables, but lacks a magnificent soundtrack to play in my head… And no Gavroche.

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The Classics… Of Shame.

5. The Secret History of the Pink Carnation by Lauren Willig. It’s historical fiction with a pretty cover. I couldn’t be expected to resist the purchase, and yet… Still unread.

6. Shakespeare’s Wife by Germaine Greer. It’s historical fiction about, uh, Shakespeare’s wife. You know. Anne Hathaway. The one that didn’t win an Oscar. I found it in a bargain bin. I really loved the movie Shakespeare in Love, so perhaps I just don’t want to hear the sad tale of the wife who was left behind when the dashing Joseph Fiennes fell for a not-yet-openly-pretentious Gwyneth Paltrow. Siiigh.

7. The Meaning of Night by Michael Cox. I bought this because it’s historical fiction. I’ve been putting off reading it because it’s about a Victorian era murderer. I’m not big on crime novels, even historical ones. I frequently question my bargain bin judgement.

You can see the bargain stickers!

You can see the bargain stickers!

8. Ladder of Years by Anne Tyler. I bought this with Dinner At The Homesick Restaurant because I thought they sounded smart and fabulous. I read Dinner At The Homesick Restaurant and didn’t love it, so I didn’t bother with the other one on the shelf.

9. A Taxonomy of Barnacles by Galt Niederhoffer. Yeah. I bought this solely for the AWESOME title. I didn’t even read the abstract. Maybe I should. Maybe I will. Who knows?

10. House of Sand and Fog by Andre Dubus III. There was an Oprah sticker, and I am not immune to the influence of The Oprah. I don’t know why I haven’t read it. STOP JUDGING ME, OPRAH!

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Haven’t read these. Scandalous.

Alright, Bookworms. You know you’ve got some of these bad boys on your shelves. I want to hear about them so I don’t feel so alone. Spill it!

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Tutu Girls Walk Into a Barre: The Painted Girls by Cathy Marie Buchanan

Bonjour, Bookworms!

Please excuse the pun, I cannot help myself. I’m incorrigible. Today we are taking a trip to 19th Century Paris as we discuss The Painted Girls by Cathy Marie Buchanan. I don’t know about you, but when I think of ballet, I think of frothy tutus and toe shoes. I danced growing up, so I can tell you that dance apparel is not inexpensive. Thus, I was surprised to learn that the ballet dancers of the famed opera houses were often more Gavroche than Baryshnikov. (It’s probably also part of the reason ballet loves super svelte dancers… The early ones were half starved!) The youngest of the ballet girls were known as the “petite rats,” and successful dancers were frequently, uh, sponsored? by creepy old dudes. So. Yeah. The beautiful ballet had a dirty, seedy, underbelly. Scandalous.

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I suppose I shouldn’t be too shocked by this whole thing- this novel takes place a few decades after Les Miserables, it’s not as though a comprehensive initiative to eradicate poverty had been undertaken. This is a society where a girl could legally prostitute herself at the age of 16 (assuming she was declared STD free, of course. Syphilis was colloquially known as “French Pox.”) When artists were looking for ladies to model in the nude, they didn’t go knocking on the doors of aristocrats, what with all the young nubile flesh for sale. Edgar Degas was one such artist, and if you know anything about his art, you’ll know that ballet girls were among his favorite subjects. Much in the way Tracy Chevalier brought to life the subject in Vermeer’s painting in Girl With A Pearl Earring, Buchanan does for Marie Van Goethem, the model for Degas’ sculpture Little Dancer Aged 14.

Marie lives in a sketchy Parisian neighborhood with her widowed, absinthe-swilling mother and her two sisters Antoinette and Charlotte. Antoinette had been a ballet girl, though she’d been tossed out of the company for mouthing off to the director. Instead she began working as an extra in the opera, earning a ridiculously small salary. After the death of their father (and the loss of his income) it is decided that Marie and Charlotte must audition to join the ballet school. Underfed “rats” from the wrong side of the proverbial tracks they may be, but super flexible hips are a commodity worth paying for. Both Charlotte and Marie begin their dance careers, in large part to contribute to the family baguette fund. Dancing for their suppers, as it were.

Image from Metropolitan Museum of Art

This is the sculpture in question. Image from Metropolitan Museum of Art

Eventually Marie catches the eye of Degas, and she is more than willing to pose for him in varying states of undress if it keeps her family from starving (absinthe isn’t cheap, you know.) While Marie is busy being naked in front of weird old men, Antoinette strikes up a romance with a potentially sketchy fellow named Emile, who seems incapable of saving money but terribly fond of spending it (bad combination, Antoinette!) Both Marie and Antoinette (LET THEM EAT CAKE!) try to find ways to hustle for cash so tiny Charlotte will be less affected by their poverty.

In the spirit of not being a major spoilsport, I shall tell you that this novel contains prostitution, petty theft, murder, guillotines, alcoholism, scientific misinformation, and one rather disturbing incident of animal cruelty (you’ve been warned.) It’s all based on true events! A triumph of historical fiction, my friends.

So, Bookworms, how much do you love it when art imitates art?! I even made a list of such novels on Riffle! (Not on Riffle and want to be?! Let me know and I’ll send you an invite.) Tell me, Bookworms. Ballet, street urchins, Paris, art. and scandal- you’ve got to have thoughts on some of those things. Tell me, tell me, tell me!

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Astray by Emma Donoghue and The World’s Oldest Profession

Cheerio, Bookworms!

There are some really awesome book bloggers out there, did you know that? Jen at The Relentless Reader was tweeting about cleaning out her bookshelves a while back and offered up her ARC of Astray by Emma Donoghue. How nice is that?! (The answer is SUPER NICE.) So anyway, I was like “Oh please pick me!” And she was like, “I don’t even think you’re a little bit crazy, I’m going to send you a book!” It was beautiful.

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The last time I read Emma Donoghue, she was scaring the crap out of me in Room.  Astray was a collection of short stories. They were all historical fiction (my fave!) and based on REAL EVENTS. It was DELICIOUS. Elephants, gold miners, lesbian sculptors- there’s really something for everyone in this book!

My personal favorite was a the tale of the Victorian prostitute. She tried to keep her profession a secret from her younger brother, but being a hooker is tough to keep to yourself, even if you’re the very portrait of discretion. Unbeknownst to her, her little brother was in the know and managed to make a deal with a well established gentleman to help them out. The afterward told us who the well established gentleman was- Charles FREAKING Dickens! In celebration of this story, I thought we should listen to this highly appropriate tune from The Decemberists. It’s “A Cautionary Song.”

I know this is going to sound ridiculous, but I love a good prostitution story. Let’s face it, nobody goes into the “world’s oldest profession” without an interesting set of circumstances leading them there. Plus, I think these stories help give a voice to the type of people who usually get brushed under the rug by history. Soooo… Here’s a list of historical fiction books about ladies of the night!

1. Slammerkin by Emma Donoghue. Apparently Donoghue likes her trollops. I haven’t read it yet, but everyone says it’s amazing, so obviously it’s on my short list.

2. Memoirs of a Geisha by Arthur Golden. Elite Japanese prostitutes!

3. Peach Blossom Pavilion by Mingmei Yip. It’s about a Chinese house of ill repute. With the best reputation. (I steal lines from Shakespeare in Love like a boss.)

4. In The Company of the Courtesan by Sarah Dunant. Renaissance Italian paramours!

5. Les Miserables by Victor Hugo. Why haven’t you read this yet? In the book, Fantine sells her two front teeth in an effort to avoid her fall from grace. Obviously they couldn’t do that in the musical or Fantine would have to lisp through her big song… But yeah. French whores, represent!

So, Bookworms, do you enjoy collections of short stories? How about books about prostitution? Or perhaps a song that matches a book PERFECTLY? Talk to me!