Category Archives: Blogging

by

Let’s Judge Books By Their Covers!

Hey Bookworms!

I’m sorry about being out of pocket yesterday, but I had a very taxing weekend… Well. That’s a relative term I suppose. My sister’s weekend was certainly MORE taxing than mine, as she spent most of it laboring to make me an aunt for the first time, at least the first time BIOLOGICALLY. I’m an honorary aunt several times over (and I love each and every one of those pumpkins just as much as my new little guy) but THIS one can’t disown me. Good luck, Nathan! Muahahahaha.  I also had an extended conversation with a toad I found in my garden and relocated to the neighbor’s yard so I wouldn’t get startled by a hop and squish him. Then I spent time with friends, saw a movie, drank a martini called “lizard on a mattress,” planted MORE beautiful flowers, and got my crafty on helping a friend with wedding planning. I’m back now. Just in time for TOP TEN TUESDAY!

toptentuesday

This week the ladies of The Broke and The Bookish have asked the bookish blogosphere to list out their top ten favorite book covers. I do the vast majority of my reading on my kindle, so I don’t connect with book covers the way that I used to. Also, there are so many different things I like about different book covers that I decided to rebel. REBEL, I tell you! In my tenure as a blogger, I’ve been lucky enough to be taken into the bosom of some incredibly talented and generous blogger/artists. Some of their work is so incredible it deserves to be on book covers. So. MY list this week will feature art that is NOT on book covers, but should be. Ready?!

hummingbirdpoppies

Courtesy of Lillian Connelly

1. This watercolor was done by the fabulously talented Lillian Connelly. You may know her from her blog, It’s A Dome Life. I absolutely adore the colors and the hummingbirds and the poppies. Couldn’t you just see it as the cover art for an Alice Hoffman or Kate Morton title? I love this piece so much, I bought a necklace of it. Oh yeah, she’s got a zazzle store. Click HERE to get all swagged up!

Courtesy Sandra at BuLaMamaNi

Courtesy Sandra at BuLaMamaNi

2. Sandra at BuLaMamaNi does some amazing collage work, like the piece above. I love that the little girl seems to be crying flower petals. Can’t you imagine it as the cover of a tragic tale of innocence lost? Forgotten childhood? Beautiful.

3. How cool is this?! It’s wacky wonky paper dolls and it’s trippy and fabulous. I imagine it going with a quirky coming of age tale. Some teen angst, perhaps? So cool!

4. Sandra provides another awesome image. See the horses with the super long legs in the background? They remind me of the imaginary creatures at the end of His Dark Materials by Phillip Pullman, or some of the fantastical Harry Potter animals.

Lillian Connelly

Lillian Connelly

5. Lily, my dearest dear. Please forgive me this terrible pun, but I cannot resist. This piece would be the perfect cover for some Chick Lit!!! (Wah wah wah…)

BuLaMamaNi

BuLaMamaNi

6. Another piece from Sandra. I adore this one. It feels like childhood and playing in the rain and chasing butterflies. It belongs on a book that embodies these feelings!

7. Okay, okay. Chrissy isn’t an artist in the traditional sense of the word, but occasionally she dabbles in magazine collage. It makes me laugh because it’s so… Her. I like to think this should be the cover of her autobiography, entitled Snowing Like A Banshee. She gave her final creative writing project that title in college. I hated it because it made no sense. The phrase is “yelling” or “screaming” like a banshee, because a banshee is a mythological ghost that flits about making endless wailing noises. It has nothing whatsoever to do with weather. But that’s Chrissy. She makes no damn sense, but she’s tough to resist.

Art by ME!

Art by ME!

8. This is what happens when I try to draw stuff. It should never be a book cover, but I thought it would be amusing to remind you of my limitations. That’s an alligator. Saying “rawr.” Fierce.

Alright. So that’s only 8 covers, but since I cheated at the topic I figure I can fudge the number. What do you like to see in a cover, Worms? What pulls you in? It’s speech bubbles on poorly drawn reptiles, isn’t it?!

by

A Rose By Any Other Name (Confession Friday)

Forgive me Bookworms,

I must confess that I’ve been neglecting you. I am officially the crazy flower lady. I took time off of work to plant my flowers this year. Seriously. Staycationing is totally a thing and flowers are like therapeutic for me. I love them so, so much! However, since I was shopping and planting and all that good stuff, I didn’t get a lot of reading done. The fresh air takes it out of you, thus I kept falling asleep during my ritualistic pre-bedtime reading. Sorry. But! I’m going to make it up to you by listing a bunch of literary characters with flower names. Are you excited yet?!

It will be more impressive in a couple of weeks, but FLOWERS!

It will be more impressive in a couple of weeks when they’ve had a chance to fill in, but FLOWERS!

1. Harry Potter Series by JK Rowling- Floral names are all the rage among the wizard set. From Lily Potter and her muggle sister Petunia Dursley to Narcissa Malfoy, Pansy Parkinson, and Lavender Brown, JK Rowling LOVED her some floral names. Even the French weren’t immune to the foliage as everyone’s favorite Beauxbatons student Fleur (Delacour) Weasley’s name is, well, French for flower.

2. The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins- I had to look it up, but Katniss is, in fact, a real plant. It’s not just some made up hybrid thing like a mockingjay or a tracker jacker. Primrose and Rue are floral names, too. (On a side note, I’ve always assumed that Peeta’s name was a play on pita, like the bread, because he’s a baker’s son and all. Anybody else think that or am I nuts?)

3. The Great Gatsby by F Scott Fitzgerald- My word it is just Gatsby mania out there right now! Baz Luhrmann touches something and the world goes bananas! Everywhere I turn there’s more hype and parties and 20s inspired accessories. It just so happens that my list is not immune as everyone’s favorite blonde with money in her voice is named DAISY Buchanan.

You're beginning to forgive me, I can tell!

You’re beginning to forgive me, I can tell!

4. The Sookie Stackhouse by Charlaine Harris, in the later books, featured a pair of botanically named sisters who also happened to be part demon. Their names were Diantha and Gladiola. Not sure why the demons got floral names and the fairies were called Claudine and Dermott, but hey. We’ll take what we can get.

5. Atonement by Ian McEwan boasts a main character with a floral name. Briony, our misguided protagonist is named for a flowering plant in the cucumber family. I did not know it was from the cucumber family until I googled. Now I want cucumbers.

6. Little Women by Louisa May Alcott- This one’s a bit of a stretch BUT. Laurie from Little Women could be construed as a flower name. Lawrence (which Laurie is short for) means “crowned with laurel,” and laurel, as we know, is a flower!

Flowers, you guys! So many flowers!

Flowers, you guys! So many flowers!

7. Twilight by Stephanie Meyer features resident cranky barren vampress Rosalie. Her name is an obvious take off of Rose. I’m having a horrendous brain fart trying to think of other literary characters named Rose, which is probably because zillions exist but my memory is refusing to let me access them as punishment for maybe sort of wishing I could be a vampire that one time…

8. The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold- Susie Salmon has quite the name. Not only is it “Salmon, like the fish” but Susan actually means lily or lotus flower. Betcha didn’t know that one (unless your name is Susan. I mean, I know that Katie/Kathryn/etc. is of Greek origin and means “pure” so all the Susans out there probably knew this already.)

9. Snow Flower and the Secret Fan by Lisa See- Okay, the main character is named Snow Flower, so there’s that. Chinese names are ALL ABOUT the flowers. Lots of Lotus and Peony and such when reading books set in China. Beautiful.

Am I forgiven yet? Am I?

Am I forgiven yet? Am I?

10. Gone With The Wind by Margaret Mitchell- I am cheating here, because Margaret Mitchell was the author and not a character, but I’m using her as an excuse to be a know-it-all. Daisy is a nickname for Margaret. For reals. Some varieties of daisy are referred to as Marguerites, which is a version of Margaret. Boom. Nailed it.

I hope you’re not too mad at me for neglecting you and throwing together a random list post. Do any of you Bookworms have favorite literary characters with floral names? Share and share alike, my dears. Who did I forget?

by

Once Upon A Time, Before Words For Worms… (Top Ten Tuesday- The Prequel)

Good Day Bookworms!

It’s Tuesday, which can mean quite a number of things… What it means on this blog, however, is that we make LISTS. That’s right, it’s time for Top Ten Tuesday with The Broke and The Bookish! This week’s topic is the top ten books I read before I was a blogger. Here’s the thing. A lot of stuff I’ve blogged about, I read before I was a blogger. I learned to read when I was like 5 or 6… And I’ve only been blogging since August… That’s a whole LIFE of reading outside of the blogosphere. I’ve tried to narrow today’s list down to ten books that haven’t gotten a whole lot of attention on my blog… I feel like I’m screaming Outlander and Gone With The Wind and Song of Achilles every week, so I’m trying to feature some of the lesser known heroes of my bookshelf.

toptentuesday1. Stones From The River by Ursula Hegi. If you liked The Book Thief, you will love Stones From The River. It’s about a woman named Trudi who has the bad luck to have been born a dwarf in what would become Nazi Germany. Spoiler Alert: Both books involve books, resisting the regime, and hiding Jewish people at great personal risk. It’s a fantastic read and I highly recommend it!

2. Fortune’s Rocks by Anita Shreve. Anita Shreve wrote an entire series of books set at the same beach house throughout different points in history. I don’t know if I should really call them a series, though they are all obviously entwined. The characters and situations are all so different, only the landscape ties them together. Anyway, Fortune’s Rocks is set in the early 1900s (I wanted to say “turn of the century” but the stupid HANDS OF TIME just keep on ticking and that phrase is no longer useful to me!) There’s a young girl, an older man, and the kind of scandal you’d expect from a young girl getting involved with an older man (who happens to be a “fine” “upstanding” married doctor with children.) This is BY FAR my favorite Anita Shreve title, so you should probably read it.

3. Me Talk Pretty One Day by David Sedaris. This book was given to me by one of my dearest friends (who happens to have just recently graduated from veterinary school. Can we all give Dr. Erin a big CONGRATS, Words for Worms Style?) Dr. Erin gave me this book on my 19th or 20th birthday (I cannot remember, I am very, very old.) Sedaris’s humor is quirky and irreverent and bizarre and wonderful. My personal copy may look a wee bit worse for the wear, but it’s one of the books I practically beat people with until they agree to read it. (That may or may not be why it’s a wee bit worse for the wear…)

The Easter Bunny doesn't leave chocolate for French children. Church bells that fly in from Rome do. I know. I KNOW!

The Easter Bunny doesn’t leave chocolate for French children. Church bells that fly in from Rome do. I share David Sedaris’s WTF?! on that one!

4. The Kitchen God’s Wife by Amy Tan. Okay, maybe I’ve discussed some of these titles before, but dangit, they’re awesome! I read this for a literature class in college and was astounded to find myself with a taste for eel and sticky rice and a host of other Chinese dishes that I’d never eaten nor cared to taste. The mark of badass prose? Making exotic food sound appealing to a girl with a bland palate. High five, Amy Tan!

5. Fall On Your Knees by Anne Marie MacDonald. I know some of you out there shy away from anything bearing an Oprah sticker, but trust me on this one. It’s practically a Greek tragedy, except that the characters are Lebanese and Canadian. Really amazing, disturbing stuff, and it’s stuck with me for years. Side bonus? The title always gets “Oh Holy Night” stuck in my head, which is among the most beautiful Christmas carols (which has absolutely nothing to do with the content of the book, it’s just the way my brain works.)

6. Speak by Laurie Halse Anderson. This is a YA title, but it deals with THE TOUGH STUFF. Basically? The main character is date raped at a party just before she starts high school. She calls the police who come to bust up the party and is treated as a pariah. Everyone knows she was the narc, but nobody knows WHY. She never reports the rape, but has to attend school with her rapist. The emotional aftermath is raw and real and frightening. It’s a great book, but if you’ve got some of your own personal demons on this subject, you may want to skip this one.

Kristin Stewart starred in a movie version, but since brooding an morose is her default expression, it might not be too bad...

Kristin Stewart starred in a movie version, but since brooding an morose is her default expression, it might not be too bad…

7. Never Let Me Go by Kazuo Ishiguro. Awww yeah. Dystopia time. The premise of this book is that society has begun to breed human clones in order to harvest their organs for the greater good of the population. This novel takes you inside the lives of these clones. It’s a little bit science fiction, a little bit dystopian, and a whole lot of ethical conundrum rolled into a tasty little package.

8. Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides. This book tells the story of an intersex individual from a Greek family that immigrated to the US. Thanks to a genetic mutation, the narrator is raised believing she is a female until hormonal changes at puberty eventually lead to the discovery that she is biologically male… Sort of. It’s a fascinating look at a medical condition I was never aware of, and the impact gender can have on one’s psyche and family unit. If you can read this book without empathizing the crap out of Callie/Cal, I’m concerned about the size of your grinchy heart.

9. The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold. When Susie Salmon is brutally raped and murdered by her creepy neighbor, she continues to keep track of her family from the “other side.” Yes, this book starts out with a horrific tragedy, and it’s not easy to read. That’s really not a spoiler at all, because it’s at the very beginning of the book. The meat of this book is watching how her family deals with the tragedy. It also goes to show that the BEST murder weapon is, in fact, an icicle (which is NOT, by the way, the weapon that is used on Susie.)

IMG_1590

I wasn’t a huge fan of the movie… I get grouchy when they stray too far from the book. That said, Stanley Tucci is one creepy creepster. ::Shivers::

10. The Robber Bride by Margaret Atwood. This is one of Atwood’s lesser known novels. It never gets the accolades of The Blind Assassin or Alias Grace but I thought it was fantastic. It’s about a psychopathic woman who makes it her life’s mission to destroy all of her “friends’” love lives. It taught me a great many things, not the least of which being that one can give oneself scurvy by being bulimic. As if we needed ANOTHER reason eating disorders are horrible. Now you know you can get swarthy pirate conditions. Not cute, y’all.

So, Bookworms. I know that a lot of you aren’t bloggers, let alone book-specific bloggers, but I like to think that this top ten list is more of a memory lane sort of theme. What are some of the best books you’ve read in the not so recent past?

by

Bookish Boombox: A Mix Tape Masterpiece

Are you ready to ROCK, Bookworms?

The thing about writing a book blog is that if you have a slow reading week, you start running out of material. When I was composing yesterday’s Eleanor & Park review, I spent a lot of time thinking about high school and the parts of it that didn’t suck. One of my FAVORITE high school pastimes was making mix tapes. I’d comb my CD collection and pick out the best tracks to put together. I liked to theme it up, you know? I’d try to impress my friends by putting “obscure” songs off of popular albums on there, so they didn’t think I only listened to the hits. I WAS DEEP, I TELL YOU! Then I’d make cover art and use crayons and stickers… Ahhh good times. So. Since I am out of books to review for the time being, I’m making y’all a little mix tape. In honor of the sweet boom box I used to make those mix tapes, I’ve created a thematic homage to books. I’m calling it “Bookish Boombox: A Mix Tape Masterpiece.” Forgive me for the lack of crayon artwork.

Track One: “Ramble On” by Led Zeppelin. This song is based on The Lord of the Rings. Did you know that? I didn’t. (Thanks, Internet!) It’s one of those songs I mutter along with until the chorus. Anyway, I’m working on The Fellowship of the Ring right now, and, uh, “Ramble On?” Pretty darn appropriate, if you know what I’m saying….

Track Two: “Romeo & Juliet” by Dire Straits. Obviously, this song goes with Romeo & Juliet. I like to think of it as what would have become of Romeo and Juliet if they hadn’t been so impulsive and killed themselves. It’s a sad love song, and those are the best kind! This is one of my favorite, favorite songs EVER. Enjoy it!

Track Three: “Don’t Stand So Close To Me” by The Police. Every single time I hear this song I shout “just like the- old man in- that book by NABOKOV!” It’s about Lolita, obvi, and I feel that having read Lolita, it is my right to be very smug and sing that lyric at the top of my lungs.

Track Four: “Yankee Bayonet” by The Decemberists. Pretty much every song by The Decemberists is a story unto itself, because they’re completely amazing. Anyway, “Yankee Bayonet” is probably my favorite Decemberists track and it’s about the civil war- from a Southern perspective, no less. Therefore, I’ve decided it totally goes with Gone With The Wind. I suppose it would go better with GWTW if Scarlett had actually been in love with Charles Hamilton and he had been killed in battle rather than by disease, but whatever. It’s a good song and it’s MY MIX TAPE.

Track Five: “Bloodletting (The Vampire Song)” by Concrete Blonde. Funny story about this song. My very eccentric dance teacher choreographed a tap number to this song. We wore Raggedy Ann costumes complete with yarn wigs, then threw in some fangs and capes. It was seriously creepy watching a pack of 20 adolescent girls being all evil and stuff. As if it weren’t painfully obvious, this song is about vampires, so I associate it with the Sookie Stackhouse books by Charlaine Harris. It works!

There you have it, my friends. A little literary mix tape from me to you. Are there any songs you associate with books?

by

Eleanor & Park: It’ll Take You Back Faster Than a Whiff of Unwashed Gym Suit.

Sup Bookworms?!

I say “sup” because that was the thing to say when I was in high school. During high school,  I absolutely refused to use the term on the grounds that contractions should use apostrophes. I also wrote song lyrics out on the backs of all the notes I passed between classes and pasted magazine photo collages of grunge rockers onto my notebooks. (A 16 year old girl is a 16 year old girl, no matter her taste in music.)

I know what you’re thinking. “Yes, Katie. We KNOW you were a cantankerous teenager. You wrote about it once, plus, you’re a blogger. An awkward adolescence is a prerequisite, right?” I swear I have a point. The point is, I just read Eleanor & Park by Rainbow Rowell and it took me back to high school faster than whiff of unwashed gym suit.

I listened to a discman on the bus... Because I went to high school in the 90s.

I listened to a discman on the bus… Because I went to high school in the 90s.

Here’s the deal. It’s 1986. Eleanor is the new girl in school. She’s on the curvy side and has wild red hair. Her first day of school, she is denied a seat on the bus by everyone (in a move of calculated cruelty that is innate to the teenage of the species) EXCEPT a half Korean kid named Park. Eleanor and Park don’t fall in love immediately. In fact, they don’t even speak. They only begin to break the ice when Park notices that Eleanor has been reading his comic books out of the corner of her eye.

Eleanor’s got a whole lot of crap going on in her home life. She and her 4 siblings live in squalor with their abusive stepfather and their once vibrant mother (who like many abused women has become a shell of her former self.) Eleanor is in no position to be starting a relationship, but as she and Park progress from friendship to hand holding, she knows she’s a goner.

THIS BOOK! It does for YA novels what Freaks and Geeks did for high school on television. My high school experience was not Gossip Girl or Friday Night Lights. My high school experience was a whirlwind of awkward encounters and intense relationships that never materialized. Where hand holding could be MAJOR. It was so refreshing to read about an imperfect heroine who wasn’t conventionally beautiful. Sure, Eleanor has her good features, but she’s not a girl who is drop-dead-gorgeous without realizing it (cough, cough, Bella Swan.) And Park? Park is a short Asian kid who experiments with guy-liner. I challenge you to find me another YA leading man who is 5’4. Even Harry Potter was tall!

Well, NOW they're the cool kids. Source.

Well, sure, NOW they’re the cool kids. Source.

No, I didn’t listen to The Cure on my walkman on the bus, mostly because I didn’t go to high school in 1986. (I listened to The Counting Crows on my discman. Very skippy, the discman.) Even though my gym suit was definitely less horrifying than Eleanor’s polyester onesie, I dreaded gym class. My junior year, I was hit in the head with EVERY SINGLE BALL we used. I only wish I were exaggerating. I was beaned with a soccer ball, basketball, volleyball, hockey puck, tennis ball, football, softball, and the absolute pinnacle of my humiliation? Badminton birdie. I wasn’t subject to intense bullying (although I still do not have good thoughts about that girl with the slicked back ponytail and sinister eyeliner who always laughed at magnetic melon…) I didn’t have a messy home life either, but this book isn’t about winning the screwed up teen experience award. This book is about capturing the essence of being 16. It’s about first love and identity crises and confusion and the occasional glimmer greatness beneath the awkward.

I chewed through this book in two days and had to let it marinate in my brain juices before I could form coherent thoughts. Katie + Eleanor & Park = Love. The soundtracks may change, but high school will always be the same. Rainbow Rowell gets that, and for that, I salute her. (Insert well timed slow clap.)

Alright bookworms. Please tell me I’m not alone here. Let’s take this opportunity to share our most horrifying gym class experiences. It’ll be like group therapy. Ready? Go!

by

Here Comes The Bride (Through an Archway of Machetes)

Dearly Beloved,

We are gathered here today so I can make my case for being the Florist/Flower Girl for the online wedding of Lyssa of Psychobabble and Shirtless Ryan Gosling. I used to work in a flower shop, and while they only let me wash buckets and answer phones, I’m TOTALLY QUALIFIED to be an online wedding florist.

People always assume that all little girls get the opportunity to be a flower girl at some point in their lives. I’m here to tell you that THEY ARE WRONG. I was never a flower girl. It’s a travesty. Feast your eyes on 5-year-old me:

I was effing ADORABLE!

I was effing ADORABLE!

Obviously I’m not over this slight. I need this for my mental health and well being, damnit! Let’s begin. Lyssa and Ryan have chosen to have a jungle theme for their botanical elements. This is incredibly lucky, because what I really want to portray in this wedding is RAMPANT FECUNDITY. When couples marry, they are encouraged by society to, in the immortal words of Ross from Friends, “consummate like bunnies.” With this in mind, I have chosen antherium for Lyssa’s bouquet with an orchid boutonierre for Ryan.

Antherium are exceptionally phallic.

Antherium are exceptionally phallic. Oh, yes, Emily? Maid of Honor? You’ll be required to fan Lyssa with the bouquet once she passes it off to you.

And. Well. Orchids are pretty darn suggestive.

And. Well. Orchids are pretty darn suggestive.

In addition to the pornographic florals, I’ve decided to create an extra feature that will not only compliment the theme, but also protect the wedding party from Zombie attack. That’s right. The perimeter of the venue will be surrounded by tiger pits! I will have trenches dug, much in the way one would dig a moat. However, a moat would be USELESS because Zombies DON’T BREATHE and are therefore impervious to water barriers. The pits will be filled with bamboo spikes! Bamboo is the epitome of jungle-ness, and it’s also really sharp. Those spears will impale any marauding herds of the undead while allowing the guests to party unscathed. (There will be retractable walkways so no guests are accidentally impaled… Unless you get REALLY mad at your drunk uncle…)

Instead of tossing rice or blowing bubbles for Lyssa and Ryan’s grand exit, the guests will instead line up and create an archway for the couple to walk through with their party favors. You guessed it! The party favors are MACHETES! A necessity in both the jungle and the Zombie Apocalypse. I can guarantee there’s not a mason jar project on Pinterest that can compete with a freaking machete.

I’m not JUST the florist, remember? I’m also the flower girl, because the universe conspired against me and WASTED my childhood cuteness on ballet lessons. Ugh. Anyway. I’ve chosen the most SPECTACULAR dress, that fits the jungle theme perfectly:

The word you're looking for is "glorious."

The word you’re looking for is “glorious.” You’re also REALLY impressed with my sexy photoshop skills.

I implore you, dear readers, please leave a comment to let Lyssa know that I’m the right choice for all her flower needs! I’m a whirling dervish of flowers, tulle, and general bad-assery. Help me achieve my dreams!

This needs to happen. NEEDS TO!

This needs to happen. NEEDS TO!

Now, Shirtless Ryan Gosling, you may kiss the Flower Girl. Wait, I mean… No. I meant that. I really did.

by

So Far? 30 Is AWESOME!

Welcome Bookworms, Old and New!

Remember last week how I was freaking out about turning 30? So far, 30 has been kind of awesome. But. First things first. We have a WINNER of the $30 Amazon gift card. Thanks to EVERYONE for your tweets and likes and whatnot. I tallied up the entries and plugged them into a random number generator. The WINNER is… Jen Hartling! Jen is not only a dedicated bookworm, she also writes her own CERTIFIED AWESOME book blog, The Relentless Reader. May the odds be ever in your favor!

Why is 30 rocking my world? LET ME TELL YOU! I took my birthday off of work and my husband took me to the Shedd Aquarium in Chicago. He earned himself INFINITY brownie points by taking me to MEET A PENGUIN. Not only did he set me up with a penguin encounter (which is a thing they offer… Click HERE if you’re interested) but he arranged it so that we were the only two people in the penguin encounter. They’re typically done in groups of ten, but Jim in all his weasel-y wisdom managed to get us a private meet and greet with penguin #413. (I am certain he spent too much money doing this, but I had THE BEST TIME so I can’t be upset.)

Can you tell I was REALLY excited?!

Can you tell I was REALLY excited?!

The penguins at the Shedd are identified by number, they don’t have individual names (I KNOW!) In my head, Penguin #413 was Josie. Josie was super friendly and curious. She pooped twice, she pecked at my jeans, and she stepped on my galoshes several times. Sometimes she would take a deep breath and puff herself up like a penguin balloon. The trainer claimed Josie was re-setting her feathers, but I think she was just showing off her deep breathing abilities. Also, did you know penguins can sneeze? Yeah. They totally can. She has little nostril thingies on her beak that get clogged with salt from the water and the fishes, so she “sneezes” to clear them. AND! They don’t even have to monitor what they feed the penguins. Josie and her Magellenic counterparts are perfect self regulators. They fatten up temporarily during molting season, but that’s it. When the trainer offered her fish she didn’t want, she just shook her little head. Amazing.

I got to pet Josie!!!!

I got to pet Josie!!!!

I got to pet Josie on her back (which felt a lot like beagle fur- soft yet oily) AND her flipper (which felt very rubbery.) Jim got to pet Josie on the foot (which was speckled and thus impossibly adorable) and the belly.

So fun!!!

So fun!!!

Yeah, so my decade is really starting on an upswing. But that isn’t all. I was FRESHLY PRESSED this week. It’s an enormous honor and I can hardly believe the powers that be at WordPress noticed my little corner of weird, but I’m beyond thrilled by it. THRILLED, I tell you! I think 30 and I are going to get along just fine. (As long as I keep getting carded at the liquor store.)

by

The Greatest Thing That Ever Happened To Me… While I Wasn’t There

How are all the Bookworms out there doing today?

Not so great? Well. I have something wonderful that will be sure to cheer you up. You’ve met my friend Chrissy before, haven’t you? In my more philosophical moments, I like to think that there’s a grand plan behind the way things work. There are people that are meant to be in your life, and it’s weird, because once you meet them, it feels like you’re already acquainted. I like to refer to Chrissy as my “butter churning sister from a past life,” because, you know, if we DID live lives before this one, we probably would have had to churn our own butter. I tell you this so you understand that she’s got a special place in my heart, and she had that WAY PRIOR to this story. (“Can’t Buy Me Love” and all that. The Beatles are always right.)

Remember once upon a time when I reviewed Let’s Pretend This Never Happened by Jenny Lawson, otherwise known as The Great and Powerful Bloggess™? If you need to take a break and catch up, I’ll wait. You’re back? Wonderful. Suffice it to say that I’m a fan. I mean, Beyonce the giant metal chicken? The traveling red dress? She is a thousand kinds of awesome plus whipped cream plus a wine slushie and an order of fried pickles on the side.

Let’s Pretend This Never Happened was released in paperback recently (I own a Kindle copy of the original release) and to celebrate, The Great and Powerful Bloggess™ went on a book tour. One of the stops on the tour was in Chicagoland, which was fantastic news for Chrissy. It would have been great news for me too, but the event was on a Thursday. I had to work the following Friday, so making a 4 hour round trip journey wasn’t in the cards for me. Chrissy, of course, decided to go, and I was super excited for her and more than a tiny bit jealous. In fact, while she was waiting for the event to start, I did what anyone would do… I took a pathetic selfie and texted it to her so she’d feel guilty that I was missing out on the fun. Oh yeah. I’m THAT friend.

That's my best puppy dog face. I only bust it out for serious guilt trips... And the occasional foot massage.

That’s my best puppy dog face. I only bust it out for serious guilt trips… And the occasional foot massage.

I got home from a ho-hum day to find a surprise package on my doorstep. I was most pleased to see that the return address was from Chrissy. I assumed she’d located a package of deeply discounted penguin greeting cards, or perhaps a thrift store Harlequin romance novel. I was FLABBERGASTED and DELIGHTED and OVERJOYED to find an autographed copy of Let’s Pretend This Never Happened (with bonus chapter!) Chrissy used a few moments of her precious Bloggess face time to get ME a birthday gift! (I’m about to turn 30. It’s… Well. It is what it is. Presents take the edge off.)

Now, Chrissy can tell you her version of this story (I highly recommend you click HERE to read it), but the gist of it is this: Chrissy showed the Bloggess my selfie. The Bloggess KNOWS I EXIST! AND! She thinks I’m cute! Just read the inscription!

Can you hear me squealing through the computer?! It's so LOUD!

Can you hear me squealing through the computer?! It’s so LOUD!

Chrissy also inscribed her own message, of course. She likes to prove me wrong, see? I don’t like to write in books I give as gifts just in case the recipient decides to pass it on to someone else one day. (I’m not saying this happened, but MAYBE, just MAYBE at some point in my life I was the owner of a pocket sized illustrated version of the Kama Sutra… And said pocket sized edition would have made an excellent saucy bachelorette party gift, but my re-gifting attempt was THWARTED by a personalized inscription…That COMPLETELY HYPOTHETICAL situation would be totally frustrating, right?) Chrissy’s inscription basically told me that I’d probably hang on to this book. She always has to win, you know?!

Isn’t that the sweetest?! Couldn’t this story have ended RIGHT THERE and been the best thing ever? It could have, but it DIDN’T! Because Jenny Lawson is so super fantastic, she posed for a picture with Chrissy, putting her arm around an invisible ME. And Chrissy, having somehow learned how to photoshop things in a surprisingly respectable manner made me THIS:

Just let the awesomeness sink in for a minute...

Just let the awesomeness sink in for a minute… And do not question why I’m wearing a bridesmaid dress to a book signing.

It’s like I was actually there, only better. It’s better because my friend cared enough about me to blather incoherently to a famous person on my behalf. It’s better because Jenny has an incredible sense of humor and went along with the shenanigans. It’s the BEST because now I have my favorite thing in the world (a book) written by one of the people I admire most (The Bloggess) from one of my favorite people in the universe (including, but not limited to, all potential past lives.) And that, Bookworms, is how a book can be more than just a book.

Anybody out there have a story about a book inscription they’d like to share? I know not everyone’s story will be so full of superlatives and SHOUTY CAPITALS, but I’d love to hear them. Tell me something good, Worms.

by

Down The Rabbit Hole: What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty

Hey there, Hi there, Ho there, Bookworms!

Before I start talking books today, I want to tell y’all some pretty crazy news. Over the weekend I found out that I made it into the finals of the 2013 Bloggie Awards. I’m completely flabbergasted, because I am up for Best Written Weblog in a category with my super pal, Quirky Chrissy, The BLOGGESS (OMG), and The Pioneer Woman. Also in our category is a blog that I’ve not read before, but anything called Dogs on Drugs is probably amazing. So. Holy crap on a cracker! (I also would like to mention that Pocketful of Joules is nominated for Best Kept Secret Weblog and First Time Mom and Dad is nominated for Best New Weblog.) If you’re inclined to vote for such things, please do. Click HERE to submit your ballot. Alright. Shameless self promotion over. Now BOOKS!

This month’s selection for Wine and Whining Book Club was What Alice Forgot by Liane Moriarty. Alice falls off her bike during a spin class (which should teach us all a very important lesson about not trying to win races on stationary bicycles.) Anyway. Alice hits her head and when she wakes up she’s lost 10 years of her memory.

What-Alice-Forgot

10 years. Wiped out. For Alice this means she’s forgotten her three children. She has no recollection of the demise of her marriage. She doesn’t know how she’s alienated her friends and family members. It’s a complete Alice in Wonderland sort of scenario (which leads me to believe that Moriarty didn’t choose her protagonist’s name by accident.)

I found this story very intriguing. How often do you wonder what you would say if your young self could see you now? My 19-nearly-20-year-old-self would probably be REALLY stoked to find out she married that cute lab monitor. Otherwise? I don’t know. My life is pretty sweet all things considered, so I’d probably just be annoyed that I couldn’t remember my wedding, and a little pissed off that I’d gotten chubby again. WHATEVER, young Katie. YOU HAVEN’T MET STEVE’S DONUTS YET!

The first of my three meetings with Alice. What can I say? I'm a fan!Ten years ago Katie would be pleased to know she goes back to Disney World as well…

I really liked this book. I must admit that toward the middle I was a little frustrated that Alice wasn’t retrieving memories and was still bungling around. It felt a bit like the whole fish-out-of-water sequence went on for longer than necessary. However, that’s a minor complaint. I loved that it was always scents that brought on her memories the fastest. It’s totally SCIENCE that scent is the strongest sense tied to memory. Also, I like reading about Australian people, because it allows me to imagine their awesome accents. (I’ve got to come clean though, it took me an embarrassing amount of time to figure out if they were in England or Australia… It was clearly NOT North America, but Moriarty didn’t mention that we were in Sydney for a while… Partway through I had to switch my inner monologue’s accent and it was a little confusing.)

What do I mean by all this rambling? It’s a good book. If the premise sounds even a little interesting to you, give it a whirl. So. Bookworms. I’ve got to know. If you lost 10 years of your life, how discombobulated would you be? What major life events would you have missed?

P.S. Did you vote for me in the Bloggies? I think you should. XOXO.

by

Hazy Shade of Winter… Swap

Howdy Bookworms!

Have the gray days of winter been getting to you like they’ve been getting to me? There is only ONE redeeming factor of winter, in my humble opinion. In just the right type of snow, everything outside gets super super quiet. It’s the  most peaceful feeling in the world to stand outside in the gently falling snow and listen to the silence. This winter? We haven’t gotten a single peaceful snowfall. We’ve gotten angry snow. We’ve gotten icy snow. Right now it’s just rainy and gross. The cold and the rain and/or snow, the ice, the drizzle, and the lack of sunshine all combine to make me one downtrodden bookworm. Seasonal Affective Disorder? What they hey, I diagnose myself with things all the time! SAD. That’s me. S to the A to the D.

Luckily, Joules, over at Pocketful of Joules (I like to imagine she so named her blog because she is, in fact, a pocketful of sunshine) organized a blogger gift swap. She decided to make it a post Christmas affair so that we’d all have something to look forward to in the drear of midwinter. (If you recall, I also participated in Joules’ inaugural swap back in the fall, which was also crazy amazing.)

I had so much fun playing Secret Scarecrow, I couldn’t resist joining the Hazy Shade of Winter Swap (Hey Joules. I re-named your swap… Again… But the Bangles version of this song ROCKS SO HARD!) On a cold, rainy, miserable day last week, it arrived. My secret swap package! (The box was soggy, but the contents were not compromised!)

IMG_7979

How could the festive tissue paper NOT turn my frown upside down?

I did as instructed and opened the card first. Turns out my Swapper’s parents lived in a town in my neck of the woods for a while. If you’re not from the part of Illinois that ISN’T Chicagoland, these places aren’t even a blip on the radar. Total Twilight Zone moment! The note also contained instructions for my winter survival kit!

IMG_5805

Each item came with a note of explanation. So cute!

My package included: Starbucks salted caramel hot cocoa (yum), Skinny Cow chocolate caramel candy (more on this later), Sweethearts candies (the ones with the words!), a super cute notepad (for LISTS), and a cotton candy scented candle (to remind me that cotton candy season WILL be back! IT WILL!)

Sweet!

Sweet!

I owe my winter swap partner a major debt of gratitude. Everything in the package was great fun, but those Skinny Cow candies are crazy delicious! Nobody is giving me a cent to say this, but OMG. Those things. 130 calories for 3 squares of chocolate filled with caramel goodness! They are every bit as satisfying as a Ghiradelli square and way better for you! It’s so magical, Jim even liked them. I didn’t tell him they were “diet” candy, but he couldn’t tell. Seriously. Best thing ever. THANK YOU!

The last part of the Hazy Shade of Winter Swap is to guess who you secret swapper is. I’m pretty confident in my guess. It’s not because I’m a brilliant guesser. It’s because my swapper was a responsible citizen and put return address information (along with her name) on the package. So… A Grace Full Life, thank you, from the bottom of my hazy winter heart!

Let’s try to put on a happy face, shall we, Bookworms? What cheers YOU up in the dreary winter doldrums?